tale of high flying footsie last week, the answer is no, and yes. Apparently her column has been fuelling the talk shows of late as well as VSBaloney who must have had a slow news day on Sunday. While she appreciates the publicity, she must say that, firstly, Premier Jennifer Smith's odd news release to "refute allegations'' made by Hester was more than a little mischievous in that it gave the impression our Leader was denying her never-ending First Class Cabin footrub by The Colonel David Burch ever took place. Nevertheless, Hester does offer a sincere apology to Ms Smith, for the Island's daring gossip queen did indulge in a little too much holiday season revelling and muddled up the flights. The massage of the First Feet actually took place on a flight to the Island in December, and Hester might add, was witnessed not just by her, but by some very prominent insurance bosses and their rather amused clients.

And for the information of a certain talk show host, no, it was not a case of mistaken identity as Hester may have only been able to see the backs of their heads from her seat in economy class; Hester would never dream of flying in anything but First Class! Alas it was, in fact, another juicy incident that occurred on Hester's flight from America this month , which Hester will report on just as soon as she gets all the details.

Hester's pleased to report, though, that some good came of her awful mix-up.

In Premier Jennifer Smith's haste to "refute Hester's allegations'', the local media were given rare insight into what our Leader does for the nation.

Hester's newsroom pals would like her to pass on to the powers that be that a regular monthly fax of the press-shy Premier's official engagements would be greatly appreciated. A busy Ms Smith attended no fewer than 47 official functions in January -- from the Commissioner's sherry party and a reception in honour of singer Cleo Laine , to a BIBA reception, the Governor's Council and the Bank of Butterfield Mile. Her engagements log further reveals that she, The Colonel, and the Finance Minister left the Island on Tuesday enroute to Davos, Switzerland to rub shoulders with the world's leaders and pre-eminent brains including US President Bill Clinton and British Prime Minister Tony Blair , at the annual World Economic Forum.

A "soiree event'' on the last day of the forum will see them joined by Tourism Minister David Allen and for the first time a delegation including the Bermuda Regiment Band and the Warner Gombey Troupe...well one could argue that boosting our sickly Tourism industry does require radical action ...let's see if this pays off.

Sheila Tyrrell , wife of PLP general-secretary and Bermuda Football Association supremo Neville Tyrrell , might not be a country music fan, but if she were, the late Tammy Wynette's hit "Stand By Your Man'' would likely rank among her favourites. Seemingly miffed at the latest attack on her husband in Gazette Sports Editor Adrian Robson's Friday Forum column, the BFA chief's good wife could contain her anger no more. In a curt and straight-to-the-point telephone call on Friday afternoon, Mrs. Tyrrell ominously warned the Sports Ed: "Be very, very careful what you write'', before abrubtly hanging up. And the cause of this admirable display of matrimonial solidarity? It appears she took great exception to a question posed in the column as to whether Mr. Tyrrell's PLP affiliation might have had something to do with the fact that the party's MPs have remained conspicuously silent over the proposed axeing of Bermuda's favourite soccer son, BFA technical director Clyde Best .

Given the public interest and outcry over Mr. Best's pending departure, a perfectly reasonable question, Hester thinks.

Hester hopes the departure of controversial Permanent Secretary for Education Dr. Marion Robinson and her replacement by Michelle Khaldun will usher in a new era of harmony at the Department. Apparently there was no love lost among her and a number of our academic lot. Hester is told teachers have taken to tearing up an advert invite to Dr. Robinson's $100-a-seat retirement banquet this Saturday at the Fairmont Southampton Princess as a sign they were not treated fairly by the outgoing educator. A group of the more bitter teachers even went as far as mailing an envelope of the snipped up invitations to Hester.

So! It is not only Hester and her pals who have a problem with getting service from BTC . None other than the no-nonsense Juvenile and Family Court Magistrate Carlisle Greaves appeared to come close to bursting at the seams at having made repeated calls to the "BTC service department'' only to be left months later still with the problem. After several hours of a phone just outside the door ringing loudly once or twice a minute, during the sombre Harrington Sound arson trial proceedings yesterday, an exasperated Mr.

Greaves, hands in the air, said: "Oh, that phone is going to drive me, just...I keep calling, and calling them about it. They installed it wrong months ago and they set it to ring out there. It's not even mine!'' To top it off, the outburst came while Mr. Greaves was writing in longhand the testimony -- another of Hester's peeves -- of a very soft spoken witness.