Retail spending might have been off in the third quarter, but major cash registers were singing a lively tune yesterday as residents and visitors alike flocked to the sales. What, one wondered, could they possibly be lacking just two days after Santa had dispensed his largesse under their Christmas trees? Was it simply the prospect of a hot bargain? A chance to jump-start next year's Christmas shopping on the cheap, or, in the case of Ce mcile's big fire sale, the possibility of owning a supposedly rarefied label at a fraction of the original price tag? Lifestyle's Nancy Acton took to the shops in search of answers, and while the reasons included all of the above and more, others had a different mission.

Many were anxious to return a prickly sweater, skimpy nightdress, hideous scarf, or tacky necktie, while visitors were comparison shopping, and others were just killing time in their lunchhour. This is what we learned.

Bundled up against the early morning cold, silent and increasingly impatient as the appointed hour of 10 a.m. came and went, they waited in a solid column stretching from the door of Number 6 shed to the sidewalk. At its head a female security guard stood implacably, perhaps weighing up her chances of being crushed in the oncoming tide; in the middle were a sprinkling of men, while at the tail-end curious passers-by enquired as to what was going on.

This was the prelude to what one woman described as "the only exciting thing that is happening in Bermuda'' -- Ce mcile's fire sale.

"It's like Harrod's sale,'' her companion enthused. "We've come to see the action.'' "I think this is where all the women in Bermuda are going to be this morning.

I sure hope it's worth it,'' another offered.

"Yeah,'' said a New Yorker. "We happened to see it in the paper and thought it sounded like a nice place to be.'' Finally, at 10.15 a.m. the doors swung open, and the crowd moved hurriedly forward.

Once inside, they were faced with orderly racks of clothing, neatly sorted by size, and often by type -- jackets, summer clothing, suits, and so on.

Along one wall were heaps of pareos, scarves, embroidered pillows, espadrilles, fake fur handbags, and a battered pink straw hat.

Rudimentary cubicles, hastily fashioned from plywood and flimsy fabric, stood ready to receive the strippers. Initially, there were but two dusty, full-length mirrors tucked in a nearby corner to service the dozens of shoppers needing them -- a situation later amended with the arrival of a few more, some of which would be passed from one cubicle to another.

In seconds the familiar scraping of hangers on rails filled the room. Chatter was minimal, and there were no gasps of delight. Just plenty of solid, silent concentration. One by one, garments were pulled from the racks, weighed up, and either piled up on arms or put back.

This was Woman in her Glory.

Surveying the denizens of female bargain hunters, Ralph from Vancouver, on his seventh holiday here with his wife, said: "You know, this is a gene thing. No man has shopping genes like this. We might line up for football tickets, but we would never go through this for clothing because it's not that important.'' Since his wife and daughter were both in the dressing room with the credit cards, we asked if he was nervous.

"Nervous? No. But I wish they'd hurry up because I'm embarrassed standing here holding this,'' he said.

And small wonder, for "this'' was a lime green sweater with matching fake fur trim.

A wan smile was all an attorney's wife could manage as she clutched a grey pashmina.

"I came for black, but I could only find grey,'' she said, drifting away.

Meanwhile, a woman was overheard telling a security guard about a pair of Italian bikini briefs that were originally priced at $135.

"Can you imagine anyone paying that for a little pair of underpants? I mean, they're like slingshots!'' she exclaimed.

"Well,'' the guard replied, "you're putting gold in them, you know.'' Nonetheless, a Cecile m habitue m was similarly miffed at what she saw as overpricing.

"Those briefs were 75 percent off in the store, and they're 60 percent off here,'' she alleged.

"Yes, and this sweater was also cheaper in the store,'' an elegant devotee claimed.

To be sure, while many shoppers had joy written all over their faces as they joined the endless cash register queues with arm-breaking piles of fine clothing, others were not so impressed with the pricing.

"$1050 originally for this suit?'' a 30-something woman scoffed. "Come on! I could fly to Australia for that.'' "These are no bargains,'' two Asian ladies maintained. "After all, this stuff is smoke damaged. It should be 75% off at least.'' A young office worker also had her hopes of joining the smart set dashed.

"I came because I thought, `At last I can shop at Cecile's', but it's still way beyond my budget,'' she groaned.

Not so the jolly St. David's Islander.

"Girl,'' she said, "Do you think this is me?'' Assured that it was, she left with a black sweater embroidered with tropical fruit.

"You'll be able to celebrate in that,'' someone offered.

"I'm celebrated already!'' she laughed over her shoulder.

Don from America was impressed with local manners. He said he had never in his life seen such well-behaved shoppers at a sale. Apparently, he was used to women fighting to the death over an item.

While men peeked through the Front Street windows as the bolder belles stripped to their underwear where they stood, survivors of the scrum waited patiently to pay.

"Hey girl, whatcha buy?'' someone called out to a colleague.

"These two dresses,'' her friend called back, holding up a jazzy red and black, fur-trimmed number, and a shocking pink "little girl'' style.

"One film star, one virginal,'' the buyer explained.

In Cooper's there was a gentle buzz as shoppers surveyed selected merchandise on sale.

"Do you think this is too small?'' a man asked uncertainly as he stood in a bright green pullover.

"Too small?'' the manager responded. "No sir, there's plenty of room in this. You don't want anything too tight and sexy.'' The man looked distinctly bemused. Perhaps he did.

"Our real sale comes after New Year's,'' a clerk told a disappointed buyer complaining about the mark-downs on selected items only.

Meanwhile, in the Ladies department there was a lot of interest in evening wear.

"I'm supposed to be buying something for my daughter,'' a mother giggled, "but then I found this for me.'' At the Returns counter, a shopper bemoaned the fact that she had received no less than five identical necklaces, obliging her to return four of them.

Asked how she had convinced each donor that she "loved'' their gift, she rolled up her eyes and said: "I faked it'' with a certain smile.

An unmarried insurance executive was ecstatic that he had already bought a beautiful leather jacket for $97.50 and a sports jacket for $87.50 elsewhere.

"I opened the paper this morning, saw the ads and said, `Let's take a walk','' he explained.

He was less enchanted, however, with the gifts women had bought him which were either not to his taste, the wrong size, or surplus to requirements, and would have to be exchanged.

"Women always buy me underwear that's too small,'' he huffed. "It's insulting, isn't it?'' At Gibbons Co. the men's and ladies departments were busy, while in ladies lingerie two bountiful seniors picked over the star-spangled briefs.

"Good Lord,'' one said, "In my day, my mother would have horse-whipped me if I dared to wear anything like this.'' Equally astonished were the sisters who beheld the racks of Valentine's pyjamas.

"Whaaat, already? That's disgusting. We're not even over Christmas yet!'' "Ah-ah -- but they're cute jus' de same, innuh?'' Trimingham's was packed with bargain hunters pursuing the 50% off lure, and again huge queues formed at all registers. Despite the stifling heat they stood fast.

A pair of teenagers, acknowledging that their normally super-thrifty father had come up trumps "for once'' with the Christmas shopping, were now on the look-out for New Year's eve dresses, leaving the distinct impression that by the time daddy-o discovered the wreckage to his credit card they would be safely back in school.

"I am not supposed to be looking for anything,'' a housewife with an armful of clothes laughed, "but my closet is hungry, and so will my husband be when I get through here!'' At the Returns counter, a matron said the sweater she had been given was the wrong size.

"I'm too fat,'' she blurted out. "No, wait a minute, make that "It was unsuitable''.

An East End businesswoman was thrilled that she had found two suits and two pairs of slacks for the grand total of $230.

"Sharp!'' she exclaimed.

In the men's department, male shoppers were just as studious and picky as the women.

Two young fellows from Chicago, "dragged in'' by their parents, soon changed their attitude when they saw the Kenneth Cole shirts.

"They're really good prices -- better than home'' they said, scooping up several.

"It's my day off, and I thought I'd just stretch my legs, but then I found some ties,'' a doctor said, patiently standing in line with a bundle.

"I was just taking a short cut to The Phoenix, but you see what's happened,'' a man laughed, holding up some trousers and sweaters. "I got waylaid -- just like the women.'' "I'm just being dutiful,'' an elderly visitor joked. "My job is to hold the bags while my wife shops for me. She wears the pants you know.'' Smith's, too, was busy, but not frenzied.

A woman proudly showed us a pair of ties she had bought to give her husband for their 25th wedding anniversary in the summer. No marks for originality, perhaps, but you can't knock a quarter-century partnership.

Elsewhere in the store, a visiting local physician was holding "old home week'' with his family and friends as other shoppers worked around the group.

In the Home Furnishings department, an Irishman said he had come to town hoping a settee "would just jump out and grab'' his fancy. Since it hadn't, he was settling for chocolates instead, before going home to measure lampshades.

"Are you having fun?'' Lifestyle asked a 50-something lady, dressed to kill and covered in jewellery, as she hustled through the store.

"I am not, '' she snapped. "It's frustrating.'' Which, of course, made her unique among the thrift-conscious throngs of Hamilton.

Photos by Tony Cordeiro Hot Spots: Bargain-hunters thronged to Cecile's fire sale (top) at Number 6 shed yesterday. Racks crowded with designer wear and upscale merchandise offered at 60 percent of its original price proved an irresistible lure, and sales were brisk. Tenley Soares (above left) and Peggy Horsey compare notes as they eye the manly bargains to be found in Hamilton's post-Christmas sales.