shopping.

Yes, apart from receiving a bounty of beautifully wrapped goodies on Christmas morning, there's nothing Hester enjoys more than a trek into town to see what all those fabulous stores have on offer.

Or at least that was the case until this week when a shopaholic friend came unstuck on a shopping expedition.

Masters Ltd. on Dundonald Street was the scene of the embarrassment. While walking through the aisles our gallant gal, who considers herself a professional shopper, found she had drawn just a little too much attention to herself.

Already laden down with festive buys, she suddenly spotted a display of brilliant red Poinsettias dotted on the floor around the Christmas trees and ornaments for sale.

Realising a specimen of the traditional festive plant would finish off her Christmas decorations a treat, she wandered over and began to carefully peruse the seasonal greenery, crouching down on her knees and struggling not to drop anything.

Pretty Poinsettia duly in hand, our shopper was feeling very pleased with herself as she headed towards the check-out, when she suddenly felt a firm hand on her shoulder.

Turning around she realised she was being confronted by a perplexed security guard who demanded to know where she was going with the potential purchase.

Slightly red-faced, she explained her honourable intentions, only to be told by the burly law-enforcer that she could not have it.

"I'm afraid you can't have that,'' he said. "They're only on display -- they're part of our decorations.

"You will have to go to Brighton Nurseries if you want one -- they do deliver.'' Embarrassed and slightly peeved that she had missed the opportunity to spend more cash, she was forced to come away empty handed.

In regaling the story to yours truly, she revealed that she had never stolen anything in her life, or been under suspicion for stealing.

"I wouldn't have minded, but I had spent ten minutes on my knees choosing the best one,'' she said.

The season of goodwill might well be upon us but -- predictably enough -- Hester hears it hasn't extended to some sections of the House of Assembly.

Madam Premier took centre stage and did a very passable impression of Scrooge during last Friday's mammoth pantomime...er, debate.

Among the supporting cast was Lois Browne Evans who was given a walk-on role as, of course, our very own Dame. Wandering into a half empty chamber with a bag of candy, our big-hearted AG spotted a semi-comatose UBP MP Allan Marshall (rehearsing for his role of Rip van Winkle perhaps?) and thought that a gobstopper might perk the Opposition member up a bit.

But just as the bag of tooth-rotting toffees was being proffered, our glorious leader cast a glare from the other side of the House and ordered: "Don't give him one!'' The redoubtable Attorney General, always her own woman, blithely ignored Ms Smith and handed over a candy to Mr. Marshall.

Hester likes to think the best of folks, and sincerely hopes the Premier wasn't being serious.

Does anyone ever show up for anything? Not these days, it seems.

Hester flew to London last week to attend the 14th annual dinner given by the Bermuda Society, a dedicated group of pro-Bermudians living in the UK. The bash was at the Merchant Taylors' Hall, a snooty City of London livery club.

Guest of honour, due to speak after dinner, was Baroness Scotland .

Hester was looking forward to the society bash and wore a special frock to meet the Baroness, into whose hands Tony Blair appears to have cast Bermuda's constitutional future.

Imagine Hester's disappointment, then, when the Baroness cried off at the last moment, claiming that she was "needed in Parliament under a three-line whip''. Hester reckons the Baroness's Bermuda relatives -- she's related to PLP Sen. Calvin Smith -- warned her off trying to defend her lack of interest in Bermudian democracy to the conservative bunch at the Bermuda Society.

Imagine Hester's surprise, therefore, to read in the prestigious London Daily Telegraph the next day: "Other speakers (at the dinner) included Baroness Scotland of Asthal, QC, Parliamentary Under-Secretary of State, Foreign and Commonwealth Office.'' It seems the old adage that you can't believe all you read applies even to the quality press.

One speaker who did show up was William Woods of the Bermuda Stock Exchange, who came to the dinner fresh from a presentation for Londoners on how to do e-commerce in Bermuda. Remember the age-old question: what would you do if you gave a party and no-one came? Hester reckons Mr. Woods knows the answer. She is told that Mr. Woods and his roadshow buddies attracted exactly no-one to their presentation earlier that evening.