Divorce Care set up by Wayne Dill and Ernest Peets
Divorce can be an insidious situation that leaves those involved feeling alone in the wilderness.
Divorce Care, a support group run by Ernest Peets and Wayne Dill, is one option to alleviate some of the loneliness and confusion.
It offers a free, 13-week curriculum-based programme that provides care for people who are going through divorce or separation, are contemplating it, or have been through it.
“Divorce can really be an insidious situation,” said Dr Peets who is also a pastor. “Many people feel isolated, broken, and devastated in a number of different ways emotionally, spiritually, and financially.
“And a lot of people don’t know where to go to find support. From what I can tell it is the only community-based programme in Bermuda that offers specific support for people going through divorce and separation.”
Loneliness and depression, parenting and financial issues, are among the topics discussed.
“It speaks to what is matrimony,” Mr Dill said of the programme. “It looks at what is successful marriage. Divorce Care focuses on healing.
“You have to understand what you were supposed to do, what went wrong, and how you can recover.”
The programme is free, although the workbook costs $20, and meets every Thursday.
If a participant cannot afford a workbook, one will be provided. Divorce Care is also completely confidential.
For more information visit www.betterrelationships.org, call 296-7296 or e-mail drpeets@gmail.com.
Five things you can do to maintain a healthy relationship with your spouse, according to family counsellor Ernest Peets:
1. Hold regular relationship checkups. If you had premarital counselling check in with your pastor or counsellor on a regular basis after marriage as a preventive measure.
2. Hold regular family meetings that include any children that are old enough. These meetings should be an opportunity to share any concerns, positive reports and to plan for the future.
3. Spend quality time together. This may mean the couple takes time to go out together regularly, just the two of them, or it may mean a movie night in front of the television with popcorn and the whole family. It is important that couples and families have fun together.
4. Seek out a mentor couple who can offer objective advice and guidance. Usually the mentor couple is older and have been married for many years. Many churches in Bermuda offer mentoring programmes.
5. Talk regularly, and honestly, about family finances. These financial talks should be about the family’s immediate and long-term financial picture and goals for the future.
