What with visitor arrival figures continuing to head south in what David Allen might have once referred to as "a death spiral", it doesn't surprise Hester to hear that the embattled Tourism Minister has hired a PR guru to handle the media.

Hester just wonders if the perfect candidate for the post hasn't been overlooked. In a feature entitled "Bye Bye Babies - How to Escape the School Holiday Hordes", which appeared in a London-based Sunday newspaper recently, journalist David Wickers gave our Island a much needed plug by including Bermuda in a list of the best resorts "where the young ones can't follow".

And the reason why we make the A-list of child-unfriendly resorts? Apparently it's because we're far too expensive, stuck up, and there's nothing to do here anyway. Mr. Wickers writes: "Families are among the most price-sensitive of all travellers, so they're not flocking to Bermuda. Not only is it one of the most expensive destinations in the world, the grown-up style of the place - peaceful cottage hotels, dress-coded restaurants, emphasis on golf - keeps it relatively family-free."

It seems Mr. Wickers has taken a negative aspect of Bermuda and magically turned it into a positive. Hester suggests Mr. Allen should sign him up straight away to put some positive spin on the next batch of arrival statistics.

@EDITRULE:

An incident which happened to Hester suggests that Mr. Wickers might have a point. While she knows that Magistrate Will Francis wouldn't condone it, your columnist decided to help out one of Hamilton's street people while on a recent shopping jaunt in the city. Offering up a dollar bill so that the poor chap could buy himself a cup of coffee, Hester was left speechless when the cheeky beggar waived it away, saying that he wouldn't accept anything less than $10. Who said beggars can't be choosers?

@EDITRULE:

Perhaps the gentleman who spurned Hester's charity should take a leaf out of the book of that other, well-known street person, Jinx Darrell. Approached by a pair of tourists who wanted their picture taken by the Birdcage recently, Jinx dutifully obliged and started snapping away - only to then demand payment for his services as a photographer. Hester didn't hang around long enough to see if our guests parted with their greenbacks.

@EDITRULE:

Not to pick on our city's panhandlers, but there is one particularly appalling practice, which appears to have escaped the attention of the Police and the general public - hailing taxis for tourists.

On Monday, shortly after 11 p.m. a city regular was seen to approach an obviously visiting couple as they stood at the taxi stand on Front Street outside the Bank of Butterfield. Having watched them hail an already hired taxi (just why do drivers leave the yellow light on when they have passengers escapes Hester), the man, spying another approaching from behind the oblivious tourists, offered to get one for them.

They must have agreed, and he promptly raised a hand at the taxi driver, who had already committed himself to slowing and easing into the empty taxi bay. Money was exchanged for the "work" and the tourist either returned to their hotel applauding Bermudian civility, manners and hospitality or galled at such a scam. Hester thinks it's both.

@EDITRULE:

And keeping with things of a fiscal nature, Hester thoroughly enjoyed soaking up the Cup Match atmosphere last week before inadvertently stumbling across what may be a major political scoop. Spotting Government MP and good chum Dale Butler manning the PLP stand, Hester inquired as to why the ruling party's refreshment tent was so much smaller than in previous years. "We're all into making money at the moment, what with the election next month," was Dale's reply.

Had the dickie-bowed backbencher let slip a political gaffe or, knowing Hester's penchant for gossip, was he simply up to a bit of mischief-making? I suppose we won't have to wait too long to find out.

@EDITRULE:

And finally... another anecdote concerning our bubbly-loving Premier. Hester hears that a lavish spread was laid on at a formal dinner at Government House last month. The finest foods and finest wines were shipped in for all the bigwigs to enjoy. All that is, apart from Madame Premier herself, who eschewed the bottles of Bordeaux being served up to hoi-polloi and instead quaffed champagne throughout the meal. What class!