most of the time we think of only the negative aspects of these responses. We often forget that joy, surprise and excitement are also physiological responses to stress. Negative stress, called distress, can cause physical and emotional and psychological damage unless we learn how to deal with it.

Moreover, it is well known that those who learn how to deal with the small stresses of life do better in coping when a major stressful event occurs.

Stress is one of the commonest reasons for conflict in the workplace. It results in many days lost from work -- according to a UK Journal of Nursing, it exceeds the number of workdays lost due to industrial strikes! It influences us at all levels of our daily life -- home, work, in our social relationships, in school or college, in our spiritual lives (guilt), as consumers and even on vacation.

Stress is basically our reaction to events which are out of our control. How we deal with stressors is related to experience, and to our physical and emotional health. We can either learn from the event or can react negatively by not adapting or adjusting to the circumstances.

Most people try to cope with stressful situations in two ways -- by focusing on the problem and/or by focusing on their emotions. Problem solving defines the problem, chooses from a variety of possible solutions and then puts that solution into action. This may be action directed towards self (e.g. changing our own behaviour) or directed toward the external stressor.

Coping based on emotion tries to substitute positive emotions for negative ones. This is the method used when the stress is uncontrollable or when it enables the person to find some emotional energy so that she can then deal with the problem actively. If he or she feels better, she can then put the problem in perspective and manage to take some action to relieve the stress.

If this is not possible, her new-found feeling of well-being will help her to learn to live with it.

There are many positive ways to achieve this good feeling of feeling better but it needs to be mentioned that there are also some which ultimately add stress in the long run e.g. alcohol or chemical use, overeating, promiscuous sexual behaviour and inappropriate venting of anger through physical violence.

Several studies have identified an increase in the risk of cardiac disease with the level of a person's hostility, whether it is obvious or even repressed. For this reason people need to learn skills to use when coping with stress in a positive way. The Type-A personality, which can be identified as the aggressive, assertive and competitive personality, who won't delegate responsibility, is most at risk to be suffering from a degree of hostility either above or below the surface. In contrast, the opposite type who is shy, non-argumentative, overly sensitive to criticism, has no self-confidence nor self-esteem and cannot say `no' is also at risk from stress, as the negative response is turned inward and can lead to anxiety and depression.

Here are a few suggestions which can often help us to cope: 1. Exercise 2. Relaxation therapy.

3. Improve your sleep habits.

4. Develop good eating habits.

5. Communicate.

6. Seek help.

7. Recreation.

8. Reward yourself.

9. Become a good time-manager.

10. Don't expect miracles.

11. Accept yourself.

12. Teach others by example.

Mary B. Boorman Registered Nurse, Department of Health HEALTH & SOCIAL ISSUES HTH