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Courage and loving in the City of Lights

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Can’t block out the sun for ever: Vegas gave writer Julia Pitt a wake-up call

The Las Vegas Strip — not the first place one would expect to have a spiritual awakening. It wasn’t chance however, a win at a blackjack table or a line of cherries setting the sirens off, but I feel I’ve hit a jackpot all the same.

I went to Vegas for a workshop with one of my favourite authors: Robert Holden, the world-renowned coach and life enthusiast, and a generally very funny guy.

I knew the event would be good, but how often are our expectations limited by our own imagination? I was incredibly moved by so much of what was said — and there was a lot. I want to share it all with you, but where do I start?

Perhaps with the truth. Being honest, it’s not something we do very often, or should I say, something I do. I’m not calling myself a liar. More of an avoider, a hider maybe. I brush over uncomfortable thoughts and feelings, mask insecurities and doubts, pretend I know stuff that I perhaps only vaguely grasp. Basically, I would say, I function well in our society.

My coaching promotes authenticity. It says so on my website: the world is a better place when we bring our authentic selves to the table. I know this. Intellectually, I know this. The decisions I make and the way I live life may even seem slightly off the wall compared to many. I write about my thoughts and feelings in the national newspaper, for goodness sake. Doesn’t that make me authentic?

Yes, I share my vulnerability, but I rarely share my whole truth. I give away glimpses of it, but only in a safe way. Safe in a way that I hope readers will still think me normal, if a little wacky. Safe in the hope people will consider me clever, witty, professional and still want to be coached by me. Safely protecting my self-created image that I’m terrified to have shattered. Safe from letting anyone see my shameful, hidden secrets — my truth.

Because who wants to be coached by somebody who has been struggling with their own existential crisis for the past three years? Who wants to hear how confused and lonely and scared someone else feels at times? Aren’t we just looking for answers to make us feel better? Tips to reassure us that everything is going to be OK? We don’t want someone else’s truth, because we don’t want to have to look at our own.

Besides, I don’t want to see my truth. Then, I’d have to do something about it and admit to myself that I’m not actually living in authenticity. I’d have to accept that I’m a conventional fraud, too timid to own my own shadow.

But this weekend I’ve just been shown it. Darn!

So, now what do I do?

Put in the work. Work on being brave enough to speak and write my truth. Work towards listening to that inner voice of wisdom that guides me in directions that sometimes seem pretty scary because of the magnitude of what might be involved or the fear of what that might mean for my ego: that image of myself I’ve worked so hard to protect.

It’s exciting though, and terrifying. A bit like a roulette wheel. Remembering though, that somehow our truly authentic self has all the numbers covered. Elvis himself said, “Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain’t going away.”

Might it be time to shed a little sun on your inner truth?

The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are

— Joseph Campbell

Julia Pitt is a trained success coach and certified NLP practitioner on the team at Benedict Associates. For further information contact Julia on705-7488, www.juliapittcoaching.com.

Party town: New Year’s Eve celebration along the strip