controversy leading up to his participation in this summer's Commonwealth Games in Victoria, Canada.

And the New Zealander reveals that he came close to "throwing in the towel'' on more than one occasion following the dispute over whether he should represent the Island.

Forgesson, this year's May 24 Marathon Derby winner, qualified for the Games last year but was told by Bermuda Olympic Association just weeks before leaving for Canada that he would have to "prove his fitness''.

This decision was later reversed by the BOA, but then Forgesson came under fire from both fellow runner Mike Watson and national coach Gerry Swan. Watson labelled the qualifying time as "soft'' and Swan insisted the fitness test the BOA had originally demanded was not unreasonable.

Forgesson went on to compete in Victoria but was disappointed in his time of 2:34.23, finishing 26th out of 30 after struggling badly over the last five miles.

In this month's newsletter put out by Mid Atlantic Athletic Club, of which Forgesson is a member, the 30-year-old says the weeks leading up to the so-called Friendly Games "were anything but friendly for me''.

He continued: "The trials and tribulations of proposed fitness tests, questions of standards etc., made the whole experience more like one from a soap opera than an athletic event I had been training towards for about two years.

"The petty jealousies and personality conflicts that are a constant undercurrent to Bermuda life had risen to the fore on this issue leading to unwarranted and unwelcome intervention from various individuals with their own biased agendas.

"I couldn't help but feel I was in the middle of a dispute much bigger than my athletic performances -- it seemed to be a dispute with a four year recurrence interval and my name had been substituted this time around for Sandra Mewett.

"Certainly not coincidentally, the Commonwealth Games are the only major festival under the auspices of the IAAF that expat non-Bermudians can attend and represent Bermuda.'' Forgesson added, however, that he was grateful to those who offered support and encouragement.

"Your support was well received and appreciated,'' he went on. "I have to admit that there were times I felt like throwing in the towel, and had to fight back the urge more than once to tell certain individuals my real feelings of them.

"I guess what I discovered most enlightening was how much I disliked losing control over my running.'' He added: "In the end I was very glad I was able to experience the Commonwealth Games first hand. It was a humbling experience standing on the start line and looking around at a field of 30 participants, most of whom weighed no more than 120-lbs and considering the strong possibility that I would be last by a long way.'' BRETT FORGESSON -- Spoke for first time about Commonwealth Games controversy.