It’s Friday afternoon and as I get ready to cover Monday’s election for The Royal Gazette, it occurs to me that no matter who wins, there’s going to be a lot of disappointment. For the record, I am non-partisan. I always vote for the candidate whose views are most closely aligned with mine they may be PLP, OBA or an independent. In recent weeks I’ve often been taken aback by how dire people believe local life will be if their party does not win.In truth, they’ve made me nervous about it as well: all international businesses are out of here should one side win; if the other wins expect massive job and benefit cuts and a violent rebellion. But by the time you are reading this, one side will have one and one lost. And across the Island, on a more individual level, there are candidates that won and others that didn’t.While there is jubilation for the winners, I’m concerned about how those who lost will fare not just the candidates, but their supporters as well.Chartered psychologist Susan Adhemar agreed that many in the Country might be fearful if they lose the election but she said that fear is a result of not being in control.“If we don’t feel in control we will feel fear,” she said.And it’s that fear that may cause people to become depressed and feel their life is hopeless.According to Ms Adhemar this is learned helplessness.“Learned helplessness and feelings of ‘what’s the point?’ are [signs of] despair and despondency but that only occurs if you are trying to control something you cannot control,” she said. “The only antidote is choice in how you respond.”Her advice for combating disappointment over the election result is to recognise that you still matter and you continue to have choices. She suggests we ask ourselves questions like: What can I do to challenge or support my Government? What can I do differently to achieve a different outcome?“It’s important to take apart the power dynamic and turn it into a win-win situation,” she said.American clinical psychologist and columnist Elisabeth Lombardo offers the same advice. One of the five tips she suggested for tackling disappointment after the November US presidential election, was for people to focus their attention on what they can do.“Rather than concentrate on what is wrong because of the election results, focus on what you can do to make things better. Find a cause about which you feel passionate and do some volunteering,” she said.Top of Dr Lombardo’s list however was to “be careful how you react when you first hear the news”.She said anger and deep upset can cause outbursts that result in us offending people around us. This can in fact cause us more problems. And if children are around it’s especially important to choose our words wisely.“You do not want to scare them with what you say. Comments like, ‘Our Country will never survive this,’ could be taken literally,” she said.Dr Lombardo also advises stress-reduction practices like taking deep breaths, going for a walk and even avoiding conversations involving politics for a while. She said stress, even apart from election results, can cause us to be in a bad mood and have a bleak outlook.“Anything to reduce your stress will help you better deal with your disappointment,” she said.Not taking what people say personally, is also helpful in dealing with election disappointment. Dr Lombardo said: “Most likely there will be people around you who are happy with the results. When we are upset, it is easy to personalise other people’s comments as an attack on us.“In reality, someone else’s opposing political beliefs have nothing to do with you. So remember that they are entitled to their opinions, just as you are entitled to yours. Do not personalise their differing political beliefs as an indication that they oppose you, as a person. And respect their freedom of speech.”While the suggestions here are to carefully consider how you react and what you say following election results, it is important not to suppress your feelings, Ms Adhemar said.“Every single person should feel that they matter. That will be the sign of a good government. We want to know we are being listened to and that people care about the impact they are making.“Power dynamics must never be exploited and those on the receiving end of the power dynamic must always recognise they have choices.”