Oops!… A mistake.Be it an erroneous fact or bad judgment call, we got it wrong, we messed up, we let someone down, if only ourselves. I’ve heard it claimed that statistically, an average of 70 percent of the decisions we make are wrong. What is certain is that, over time, we all make mistakes.What makes the difference though, is how we decide to handle them.How do you treat a mistake?You might bury it, deny it, blame it on someone else, admit to it, flog yourself with guilt and remorse over it, or use it to learn and grow from.Fear of reproach or judgment can lead us to try and cover up and hide mistakes, worried what others will think of us. Denying or sweeping mistakes under the carpet tends to compound their negative fallout when they eventually catch up with us. Either deliberately ignoring our errors or not remaining vigilant and checking our results along the way, leaves us, and others, to build on falsities. Instead it is far easier to correct the foundations at the start than wait until there’s a ten-storey construction on top of it.When things go wrong we may shift the finger of blame to someone or something else in an attempt to distance ourselves from the error and remain untarnished. Ironically however, this tactic often results in a loss of trust and respect by others.Equally unproductive is wallowing in guilt and remorse over our errors. Ruminating on the mistake itself, replaying it in our minds, keeps us trapped in the negative aspect of the experience. Beating ourselves up and feeling guilty about what went wrong is not going to solve the situation and can leave us feeling paralysed about taking action.Culturally we tend to take a very dim view of making mistakes. Consider the negative connotations of words like ‘failure’ and ‘wrong’. We are generally told to avoid mistakes and most of us dread making them. And yet mistakes are one of our most basic ways of learning. From our first attempts and walking and talking, to running a business, our errors show us what doesn’t work and from there, we work out what does. Obviously some mistakes can be more costly (financially or personally) and we are fortunate that, with attention, we can also learn from the mistakes of others, but living in fear of making our own can be debilitating. The anxiety and fear associated with making mistakes can limit us from trying new and different things and taking healthy risks. Writer and philosopher Elbert Hubbard suggested that, “The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.”Changing our way of viewing our ‘slip-ups’ can help reduce our fears surrounding them. Try seeing it as a mistake (like when filming a movie): it’s a ‘take’ or a try that didn’t work. Then ask, ‘how can we doing it differently next time?’“A mistake is to commit a misunderstanding,” said Bob Dylan. This way they become much easier to admit, forgive and move on from.My eccentric art teacher at school had a great view on mistakes and weaknesses. “Don’t disguise, emphasise!” she’d say in a drawn-out, plumy voice, usually followed by ‘daaahling’ and proceed to make the wonky nose the focus of the picture. Perhaps more appropriate for some mistakes than others.When we do make mistakes, either small or large, what is important is that we deal with them appropriately, considerately and productively. Consider the following steps for successfully handling mistakes, complied from various management and leadership resources:1. Acknowledge the mistake — owning up to and admitting our mistakes actually builds trust as others can see us taking responsibility and is a recognised characteristic of good leadership.2. Take responsibility — Ask: how am I/are my actions responsible for this mistake?3. Apologise where appropriate — keep this short and to the point. On the receiving end, what can be as reassuring as a ‘sorry’ is knowing that steps are being taken to avoid the same mistake occurring again or that, at least, a lesson has been learned.4. Ask for forgiveness — both from those who have been affected and from ourselves. Being aware of our actions and correcting them is more productive than burdening ourselves with prolonged guilt.5. Clean up the consequences — what can you do to put things right, right now?6. Analyse the root cause of the mistake — keep asking yourself: Why did this happen? Get down to the core of the problem7. Make changes — look for a solution to the core issues from the options available and ask: what do I need to be put in place to stop this error happening again? In future, when confronted with this situation, what choice will I make for how to approach it?Some other Top Tips:l Accept you are going to make mistakes — put perfectionist fears aside and be aware that we all make them from time to time.l Be prepared for failure — for any undertaking, pre-consider possible eventualities especially regarding time-frames, resources needed, skills needed, personnel involvement etc.l Avoid common traps that can lead to mistakes — work smart, take breaks. Long work hours lead to higher incidents of mistakes, say studies by The Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development. Keep yourself in top condition to be doing your best.l ‘Cut your losses’ — the advice of world renown Executive Coach, Brian Tracey.Both in business and our personal lives, the most successful people are those prepared to keep abreast of and be very honest about what’s working and what’s not. When we refuse to accept a bad decision or choice, we prolong the consequences of it, which can be expensive and hurtful. Whether it be draining relationships that are not working, business products that are not producing the return, or any investment of time or money that is more stressful than rewarding, ask yourself: is this really serving me in my pursuit of my overall goals? If not, consider the best way to extract yourself from the unhelpful situation, using the steps above.What can really sweeten the blow of any mistake is figuring out what we can learn from it. Our failures show us what needs to be worked on and improved. NLP uses the tenet, ‘there is not failure, only feedback’. What is your feedback?A mistake can also offer the opportunity to excel ourselves, using our creativity and quick thinking to find a solution. When something goes ‘wrong’ ask: how can I prove myself here and turn this to my advantage? Remember the story of how Post-it notes were invented. How can our mistakes work for us?It may take some practice, but if we can view our mistakes as gifts and opportunities to learn and grow, then we will be less fearful about making them and more inclined to take action towards our goals and further successes.Julia Pitt is a trained Success Coach and certified NLP practitioner. For further information contact Julia on (441) 705-7488, www.juliapittcoaching.com.