“You run like a girl!”, “that’s so gay!”…. it’s amazing how harmless these throwaway comments seemed a few years ago.

Now, as the Mum of two girls, I am desperate for our little generation to grow up better, with a kinder, smarter mindset.

Wouldn’t it be great if they could build each other up, rather than tearing each other down one thoughtless comment at a time?

The subtle messaging that being gay or a girl is “weak”, is shameful. After all, aren’t people who achieve despite bias or adversity often the strongest of them all?

There’s been a video circulating on social media lately showing the difference between how little children and adolescents act when then they are asked to demonstrate how to run or fight “like a girl”.

The little children give it 100 percent — they look strong, determined and tough.

The adolescents perform caricatures with arms flailing and legs wobbling.

Then the dialogue starts popping up, telling us that girls confidence plummets during puberty.

By the time they are teens, children see the world in terms of pink and blue.

Eighty-seven percent of engineers worldwide are male. Stats are similar in the wider fields of science, math and technology.

Almost a year ago, I posted a picture of a “real-life” Barbie on our Facebook page.

The Barbie dolls we buy in store are anatomically impossible (she couldn’t stand) so a clever tech whizz produced a version with realistic proportions.

Barbie was still slim, but gone were the pencil thin thighs and the anorexic waist.

When I had a little rant about it, somebody commented “Leave Barbie alone, it’s just a doll!”.

It made me wonder if I was over-thinking it. And then somebody else responded with this Desmond Tutu quote: “We need to stop just pulling people out of the river. We need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in.”

That made me realise that it all starts somewhere. And the throwaway comments are a significant part of that.

When I looked at how pink and blue our own lives were, I saw we had an interesting mix.

My lovely husband has an executive position in a tech company, I have my own consultancy but roll the groceries, school run, doctor’s visits and play dates into the mix.

On the other hand, the LH cooks, cleans and irons like a dream, and I deal with the trash and ant invasions.

There is a major blue area though — and that is the barbecue. It’s a seriously male domain!

All that did make me wonder if I should make a point of getting the tongs out.

But why rock the boat? I think it’s worth taking a look at our lives and our conversation to make sure we aren’t accidentally limiting our children with a rigid precedent or thoughtless comments.

It would probably also help to actively show our girls that they don’t have to do just “girl” things or like “girl” colours, because the media does such a convincing job of the reverse. (Check out A Mighty Girl and Goldiblox for more food for thought on this subject.)

But I don’t think we should force ourselves into roles that we don’t want (just to make a point) either. As with most things, there is a fine line.

If I took over the barbecue, it might end in divorce. But I might send the girls outside for a barbecue lesson.

Grilling a sausage or a piece of fish seems to be a good life lesson to me — a survival skill in our first-world environment. Let’s just make it healthy shall we?

I’ll report the healthy barbecue tips this week on the Facebook page (there are some really simple but effective ideas) but you can also try out this recipe.

It’s tender and delicious whoever cooks it — you, your spouse or the (big) children!

Lemon pork chops on the BBQ!

Ingredients: (served 4 adults/big children)

4-8 Niman Ranch lean, boneless pork chops

1 lemon, juiced

1 tbsp olive oil

2 tbsp tamari

1 tsp garlic powder

1 tsp onion powder

½ tbsp apple cider vinegar

Salt/pepper

1. Whisk all the marinade ingredients together and pop in a large dish or zip-loc bag.

2. Marinade the pork for at least 30 mins in the fridge and then bring to room temp for 20 mins before cooking.

3. Grill on a hot grill, taking care to minimise the char as per the healthy BBQ tips! This will take approximately ten minutes on each side.

4. Serve with tons of green veg or a large salad and some Bermuda corn for your carbs.

The advice given in this article is not intended to replace medical advice, but to complement it. Always consult your GP if you have any health concerns. Catherine Burns BA Hons, Dip ION is the Managing Director of Natural Ltd and a fully qualified Nutritional Therapist trained by the Institute for Optimum Nutrition in the UK. Please note that she is not a Registered Dietitian. For details, please go to www.natural.bm or call 236-7511. Join Catherine on Facebook: www.facebook.com/nutrifitandnaturalnutritionbermuda