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Dolphins make brave Dominic's day

BERMUDA recently played host to one of Britain's youngest heroes ? a five year old who defied predictions that he would die from a series of problems, all of which stemmed from his mother drinking heavily while pregnant.

Dominic Head was born with foetal alcohol syndrome. By the age of four, he had undergone two heart operations. A short while later, he endured pioneering surgery which saw a tendon taken from his leg and attached to his eyelids ? previously the muscle had been too weak to hold them open. To this day, he is unable to eat solid foods. He learned to walk just over a year ago.

On Wednesday, Dominic will receive a Child of Courage award. One of ten citations presented annually to children of merit, its intent is to honour the medical struggles he bravely endured. British Prime Minister Tony Blair and his wife Cherie will host a special ceremony at No. 10 Downing Street. Following that is a star-studded awards presentation with Prince Charles at London's Westminster Abbey. Adopted in 2003 by Avril and Ron Head, Dominic was on the island last month to visit his sister Georgina, a boat builder with Dockyard company West End Yachts Ltd. The event marked the first time the family had holidayed outside the United Kingdom together.

"My husband had never been abroad before," Mrs. Head of South Croydon explained. "So initially, Georgina was just trying to persuade her dad to go. And she thought the best way, because he's a rugby player, would be to get him out there while the Rugby Classic was on."

It worked out that six members of the family ? Dominic, Mr. and Mrs. Head, their older daughter Fiona, her husband and their young son ? were able to make the ten-day trip.

Despite the fact that it rained throughout their stay, the Heads thought Bermuda was "fantastic", although not really geared towards families travelling with young children. Special criticism was reserved for some of the island's bus drivers. According to Mrs. Head, not all were especially welcoming to their group which, because of the young children, included two strollers.

"We used to worry before the bus came about how the bus driver was going to behave," she said, insisting that the high points overwhelmed the negative. Two major successes were visits to Dolphin Quest and Spicelands Riding Centre. Dolphin Quest, especially, went all out to make Dominic's visit a pleasant experience.

"Georgina had never been to Dolphin Quest but she'd met some of the girls who work there because she lives in Dockyard," Mrs. Head explained. "Before we left, she gave me the e-mail address of (Dolphin Quest's Director of Animal Behaviour) Roma Hayward. I'd heard before that children who swim with dolphins, if they have disabilities, the dolphins kind of pick it up; that it can be quite a magical moment. So I wrote, telling her we were coming over with Dominic."

Mrs. Head said she was amazed when they arrived at the Dockyard facility to discover that a programme had been tailored to suit Dominic's needs ? and the visit was free of charge.

"Roma e-mailed me back and said they would be delighted to do something for Dominic," she said. "Because he's not steady on his feet and he's very small, they allowed Georgina and I to go with him in the water. They did a very gentle, but quite short programme with him where he could see the dolphins.

"They showed him how they opened and shut their blowholes and made noises. He was very interested in it ? although a wee bit frightened of them ? but even now, he's still talking about the dolphins.

"Another thing he loved was horseback riding. Georgina took him to the stables and he rode on a pony. It's amazing how, when children have disabilities or difficulties, animals seem to pick that up really quickly.

"As soon as you bring a child (like that) to them, they suddenly become very calm, behave themselves, and are very gentle. We've seen it several times with Dominic how magical animals are when they feel there's something not quite right, if you like, with a little one, and they behave in the most extraordinary gentle manner."

Dominic was born prematurely. His problems, the most serious of which involved his heart, were identified at birth. Doctors never expected him to live. And then, he was placed in foster care with the Head family.

"We've had him from when he was seven months old," Mrs. Head said. "It was quite an amazing thing to have a child who'd been in hospital most of his life. He was seven months old and still only weighed eight pounds. He was expected to die basically. They really didn't hold that much hope that he would live."

Of huge concern was a constant stream of chest infections Dominic was forced to suffer through ? a common occurrence among children fed by tubes.

"We got him out of hospital just after he'd had a serious one," his mother said. "He never got one again. It's as if he got home with us and thought, 'No. I'm not going to be bothered to die, I'm going to carry on.' And he just went from strength to strength."

Because Dominic's physical development remains far behind that of the average five-year-old boy, serious consideration was given before the decision was made to travel to Bermuda with him. In addition to ensuring that the mechanics were available for his irregular feeding method, there was the very real concern that he might suffer a medical emergency while thousands of miles away from his regular doctors.

"He finds it quite difficult to walk," Mrs. Head said, in describing the difficulties Dominic continues to face. "He can't get his leg quite straight. He has to walk with it slightly bent. So balance is a little difficult. He finds steps a problem and walking any long distance is quite difficult for him.

"He weighs about 14 kilograms now. He's about the same size as a two to three year old. He does speak very well but he can't manage lumps of food. Sometimes he'll eat little bits of gravy or custard or mashed potato. He quite likes chocolate because it melts in his mouth (but) he's fed during the night on a pump."

Perhaps just as inspiring as Dominic's miracle existence is the ethic of the family into which he was adopted. For the past 21 years, Mr. and Mrs. Head have fostered some 130 kids while caring for their three "birth children" ? Fiona, 29, Georgina, 27, and 22-year-old Ronan. Four years ago they adopted Simon, now 15. Three children they were fostering at that time, had to be relocated while the family visited Bermuda.

WHEN asked if they realised how extraordinary their actions were, Mrs. Head insisted she and her husband were merely reacting to need. These children have often been taken away from awful home situations or potentially awful home situations that could be tragic," she explained. "Sometimes they go back to their birth parents, but if a child has been abused within the family, they obviously can't be looked after by family members because the abuse would continue.

"Some of the children that we foster have parents who are ill; there's nobody to care for them. I'm coming to the realisation that perhaps the family system is breaking down a bit. Of those 130 children, in the cases where there's been a complete breakdown, I think there were maybe three times when (an extended) family member took a child on. The children basically go up for adoption if nobody is willing to pick up the pieces."

Dominic was in their foster care facing that predicament when the Heads were approached with a solid argument from their younger son.

"All of Dominic's health conditions were caused by his birth mother's drinking," Mrs. Head explained. "We've had plenty of foster children that we've let go to adoptive families, but I think we all knew that Dominic was quite special.

"His case went before the court at the same time, they were just about getting ready to do the operation on his heart. Initially they'd said when he gets to four kilograms we'll do his surgery but (the criteria) kept changing. They kept moving the goal posts.

"Eventually, he was ready and we all sat there and thought, if this child doesn't die during the heart surgery, he's going to die of a broken heart if we adopt him out ? he loved us. We loved him. Simon, who was about 12 then, was the first one who came up to us and asked why we couldn't adopt Dominic. He said, 'If you adopted me because you loved me, then how can you let Dominic go if you love him?' It was quite a logical question."

Dominic survived the surgical experience and was welcomed into the Head home. So thrilled were they with the outcome of those events, next week's ceremony pales in comparison, according to Mrs. Head.

"For us, the biggie, I suppose, was his heart surgery," she said. "He had such a horrible time. It had been hanging over him ? almost like a death sentence ? all of his life and we knew that if it was successful it was going to make a huge difference.

"The first time it was done it went wrong and they had to do it again. He was on a life support system for 13 days. His life hung in balance. It was truly horrible. And when he came through it, he just did these amazing things.

"Suddenly he had more energy. He started walking. He was nearly four then. For a child to begin walking at nearly four is quite late in life. So, for us, all that was very miraculous.

"Another of his many problems was that he had no muscles in his eyelids so he couldn't open his eyes properly. To look, he had to tilt his head backwards and squint through the tiny slits that were there, only because the eyes couldn't quite shut properly. He never, ever complained."

According to Mrs. Head, surgeons removed a tendon from Dominic's leg which now serves as the needed support.

"They put it above his eyelids, between there and his eyebrows," she explained. "Now, for the first time, he can raise his eyebrows and open his eyes. It was just incredible. But (the award) is really weird. I find this quite difficult to understand."

Newspapers hooked onto the story of Dominic's eye surgery, his mother said. She believes that publicity led to his being chosen to receive the Child of Courage award.

"We actually heard when we were in Bermuda that he'd won one. I got a call on my mobile while wandering around the Botanical Gardens. I've no idea who put his name forward, it had been in the press quite a bit over this last year."

Mrs. Head however, familiar with the annual ceremony, organised by the British magazine .

"Every year I see the awards on the television and think, 'Oh gosh. Those children have such amazing stories.' I would never have dreamt that Dominic would be one. I just find it all very enormous."

Dominic, on the other hand, is nonplussed by this recent accolade or the fact that dignitaries will be on hand for its presentation.

"I'm not quite sure that he knows who Tony Blair is," she laughed. "He is after all only five. When we've seen a picture of the doorway at No. 10 (Downing Street), I've said to him, 'We're going to go there soon.'

"I don't think the importance has clicked. We heard last week we were going to meet Prince Charles as well. I said to him: 'You're going to meet a prince.' 'Am I?', he asked."

Her greatest concern, Mrs. Head said, is what happens to Dominic in later years ? when all the present attention fades away. "Newspapers have given us money for one or two of the stories we've done, which I've put in Dominic's kitty. Basically, he will never get compensation for what's happened to him and after a while, these stories will die down and he won't get anything.

"When he's an adult, he won't be sweet any more. He won't be as endearing. Hopefully, he'll be a lovely boy, but people haven't got a lot of time for adults with special needs."