T'WAS the last sitting before Christmas, Mr. Editor, and all through the House not a creature was stirring not even a . . . Okay, okay, that wasn't exactly true, Mr. Editor ? there were in fact 20 or so MPs in the House on the Hill at various times last Friday, some of whom were stirred to speak, and all of whom ? surprise, surprise! ? were called upon to actually vote on two occasions, before we broke for the holidays.

The surprise votes came on the amendment to make seat belts compulsory effective January 1: Happy New Year. Opposition spokesman for Transport Jamahl Simmons explained that the United Bermuda Party only want to delay its implementation six months to (1) give more time to people who were finding it difficult to obtain set belts in time to comply and (2) to encourage the Finance Minister to waive duty on imported seat belts come his February 2004 Budget.

His proposed delay amendment to the Amendment suddenly left scrambling the Transport Minister Dr. Ewart Brown, who was also doubling as Leader of the Government as the Premier was still away.

But Deputy Speaker and former Premier Jennifer Smith came to his rescue as she took some time to contemplate whether the UBP amendment should be allowed: the time afforded the two Whips to track down their missing members. In the end, the amendment wasn't allowed and a vote was forced on the Amendment itself. A loss would have meant no compulsory seat belts, period.

As it was, it was close: a tie of 13 for, and 13 against, in committee (that's a Parliamentary term for when we debate and discuss the details of a Bill) and the chairman, in this case the Deputy Speaker, got to cast the deciding vote. No surprise which way the former Premier voted ? and so the Government got the green light on compulsory seat belts.

There was another surprise vote on the third reading of the Bill later in the day, but that too, failed again by the margin of one vote. Close, you say? Sorry, but close only counts in horseshoes . . . one vote can count for a lot in Parliament . . . and so the Acting Premier and Transport Minister, who professed to have taken the surprise, snap votes in his stride ? parliamentary politics, he allowed ? got his Christmas present (to us) and his New Year wish in one: So you better watch out, you better buckle up, seat belts are coming to town.

Which one the mule? Which

one the donkey?

THE donkey and the mule got together, you might say, and pulled in the same direction on proposed review and reform of the Rules of the House. You know the cartoon, don't you, Mr. Editor, the one of the two beasts pulling in different directions and getting nothing done?

Well, the Progressive Labour Party and UBP agreed to refer to the Rules and Privileges Committee Opposition recommendations on how the Rules might be reformed: the report is available for review on the www.ubpdev.com web site).

The matter breezed through the House as both sides agreed to only two speakers ? yours truly JB the MP, who proposed the motion, and the Government Whip Ottiwell Simmons ? and, surprise, surprise, we stuck to our agreement and did it all under 30 minutes.

You would have thought it was Christmas or something, Mr. Editor, the way it went so well: but please, no wisecracks about which one the donkey and which one the mule?

PS: Now for a reality check: such a similar motion went to die in the Rules and Privileges Committee in the previous Parliament, under a previous Administration, and the agreed reference is but one small step and no giant leap.

Unique, unique and more

unique

ST. DAVID'S was extolled as unique by just about every MP who spoke on Suzann Roberts-Holshouser's motion which came next. The MP for the constituency of St. David's is pushing for the island to be made the tenth parish of Bermuda and she isn't alone in her view.

The St. David's MP also presented the House with a petition signed by 423 in the area who agree with her. Unique as St. David's may be, it seems the Government doesn't agree to the proposal for a tenth parish ? with the exception of PLP MP Wayne Perinchief who said he actually thought it was a good idea.

But his colleague Derrick Burgess said St. David's was no more unique than Tucker's Town (now read Cleveland County) or Bailey's Bay or Flatts and no one was suggesting that they be made a parish, while the PLP's Walter Lister from Sandys added Dockyard to the list.

Dean Foggo, the new PLP MP for St. George's West, also thought that St. David Islanders should continue to work within and be a part of the parish of St. George on the basis that St. David's gain would be St. George's loss. No vote was called for: it was a take note motion. Oh well, you cannot fault Suzann for trying.

A lunch to remember

ALL of the above meant we were done the House business by four in the afternoon. Only speeches on the motion to adjourn kept us to five and Christmas wishes and cheer in the Speaker's Chamber. Speaking of which, Mr. Editor, the Speaker had earlier very graciously hosted a luncheon in his Chambers for members and coaches of the winning team of the Schools Nationals Debate. I was pleased to be on hand in another capacity, president of the Bermuda Debate Society.

The students were also able to slip out of school to catch half an hour of debate and were acknowledged by the Speaker from his chair before members broke for their lunch. Food for thought: Our young student debaters follow rules which require them to state what they have to say in no more than five minutes.

Will, baby!

CHECK this: A "summary" report on the Government investigation into the Southside asbestos dumping by former PLP MP Arthur Pitcher was finally released by new Health Minister Patrice Minors. This was in respect of events which occurred between January and June of the year 2000.

It was a report that the former minister, Nelson Bascome, had been promising us ever since. Heaven help us if this is an indication of how long it takes Government to investigate and report on matters of danger and concern to the well-being of the community ? even if it does touch on one of their own.

On the other hand, Mr. Editor, the Minister of the Environment Neletha Butterfield managed to table a report into the coastal damages which Bermuda sustained thanks to Hurricane Fabian, what, three months ago. Only where there is a will, is there a way.

Will, baby, (not way) ? with apologies to Austin Powers.