IT'S an ill wind that blows no good. Ditto for Hurricane Fabian. We learned last Friday in the House on the Hill what a windfall Fabian also was for Government employees when more than $28 million by way of supplementaries for the current financial year came up for debate.

Supplementaries, you say?

Fancy, Parliamentary language for sums of money that were neither budgeted nor approved, but were required (and spent) after the 2003/2004 Budget had been formally adopted by Parliament in February last year.

You will also hear members sometimes refer to them as "supplements" ? and supplements they are, although not in the dietary sense, as they usually mean spending more millions on top of millions. In that sense, you might say they are more like suppositories: they really help the flow of money.

But this time Government really did have Fabian to blame for most of the $28 million.

A small example was the Ministry of the Environment which required an additional $475,000 for the Parks Department, principally for extra salaries and overtime.

The Minister, Neletha Butterfield, told us staff worked seven days a week for two months after Fabian. They are still not done either. Opposition MP David Dodwell shared a series of photographs which he had taken of various locales in the Parks system which showed ? in some cases dramatically ? the extent of work that still needs to be done.

Mr. Dodwell thought it was imperative it be done quickly at some venues ? he mentioned Church Bay and Horseshoe Beach in particular ? which are popular with our visitors and present a danger.

His tour of the island prompted others to think of their own constituencies. The representative for St. David's, Suzann Roberts-Holshauser, was quick off the mark. She pointed out the remedial work that still needs to be done at Cove Valley in, yes, you guessed it, St. David's.

Deputy Speaker Jennifer Smith was in the chair and wanted to get members and the debate back on track. "This is about a supplementary for Parks," she said, "Cove Valley is not in the Parks system."

"True," conceded the St. David's MP ? sitting down, satisfied she had made her point anyway. "But it ought to be," shouted out one of her fellow MPs to smiles all around.

Meanwhile, the Minister responsible told us all to be patient: "If you drive from one end of the island to another you will see that there is still a lot of work to do. We are going to get on with it but we want to do it right."

It sounds to me, and looks to me, like they are backed up ? and when you're backed up, folks, there's nothing like a parliamentary suppository to get things moving again. So we may see them coming back for more.

Parks though was a tiny sum compared to others. As you might expect, Works & Engineering topped out the list with $5,9623,200 of which $2.5 million went on the Causeway alone. On top of that there was an additional $1.28 million in wages and overtime. Airport Operations required an additional $1.5 million in wages and overtime and another $1 million in capital works, all because of Fabian.

Fabian got the rap, but the big blowhard wasn't entirely responsible for it all. Some of this big hit was also brought about by arbitrated pay awards (for post office, education, police and fire services to name but a few) which went way above what Government had budgeted for.

We also noticed they slipped in an additional $254,000 for the Carifta Games and the ICC World Cup bid: the former, we were told, to bring the track and field portion of the National Centre up to international standard for the Games, and the latter for a firm which has apparently been hired to co-ordinate and manage the Bermuda bid for the prestigious cricket competition.

So, Mr. Editor, while visitors may have fallen off following Fabian, Bermuda's economy got a boost instead from the extra money Government (and all of us) spent putting Humpty Dumpty back together again. This year, like you and everyone else around town, my vote is for more visitors; less wind.

Heal thyself who?

ESCALATING costs in health care pumped up Parliamentary blood pressure next. Finance Minister Paula Cox was piloting through an 11 per cent increase in hospital insurance premiums ? "which is over three times the rate of inflation," pointed out her Shadow, the Opposition Leader Dr. Grant Gibbons.

Ms. Cox told us that Government was being reasonable as it had not followed a recommended 22 per cent increase by the Hospital Insurance Commission. The Shadow Finance Minister said that he was nonetheless outraged by both the increase and the recommendation: "We need to analyse why the cost of health care is getting out of control, because it really is getting out of control." He wondered too what the next three-year HIP Actuarial Report would have to say ? and he thought was due about now.

The urge for a medical metaphor was irresistible. "This increase was as bitter a pill we thought we could manage," said the Minister, "when it could have been higher." So what will it be next year? "We need to find more innovative ways to deal with mounting health care costs," conceded Ms Cox, "and you're right, there is no magic bullet."

Speaking of pills and bullets, you're right, what we don't want is more parliamentary suppositories.

Consider some of these facts:

The general per diem rates for in-patients at the King Edward have gone up a minimum 38 per cent since 1997. That's well in excess of the rate of inflation or any wage increases most people have enjoyed over the same period.

Health and Personal Care prices rose at an average rate of seven per cent in 2003, according to the Consumer Price Index, and this was mainly due to increases in health insurance and prescription medicines, according to the 2003 Economic Review published by the Government.

The Bermuda Hospitals Boards Financial Statement for the year ended March 31, 2003 showed increases from 2002 of 20 per cent in employee benefits; 12 per cent in supporting medical services; and nine per cent in direct medical staff.

Add "administrative services" to the group, and together they total $72 million, well over half the hospitals' expenses. It's staggering, all right ? and no, I can't think of anything funny to say. But for now, in the words of Forrest Gump, that's all I have to say about that.

Easter brake on the House

EASTER affords MPs another break from Fridays on the Hill ? and don't ask whether they're good Fridays or bad Fridays, none of us can tell, voters are the judges ? and this year we will be off for seven weeks returning on Friday, May 7.

This, after a nine-week break over Christmas. But don't blame me or the Opposition, the return dates are the Premier's call. When we come back they're won't be a lot of legislation waiting either: it's starting to look like the legislative sausage factory has slowed right down.

The only items on the Order Paper are motions: one from Government and four from the Opposition. The one Government motion was put down on Friday last by Deputy Premier Dr. Ewart Brown ? they want us to "take note" of Government's intention to develop a master plan for the Hamilton City waterfront. Take note means no vote and who's to say what their intentions are?

Meanwhile, the Opposition renewed a motion outstanding from the House on the Hill from the last Parliament and that is for the introduction and implementation of mandatory drug testing for MPs ? and that is going to actually call for a vote.

Identity theft in the New Bermuda

A LIGHT note: My former running-mate Michael Dunkley has in recent times received a little more attention than he probably wanted ? and the question of his identity cropped up in the House a few weeks back. Transport Minister Dr. Brown was waxing on and on about an amazing turnaround at TCD which had occurred under his watch and that of the PLP. "I'll give you that," shouted your obedient servant, "it must be one of the few places in the world now where you can go in a white man and come out black."

To laughter all around, Dr. Brown was not about to be outdone.

"The one thing we on this side can't figure out," he said, chuckling, "is why he wanted to be Michael Dunkley in the first place."

Now we know ? and so I end where I began ? on the subject of (more) money.