will be honouring one that is long-standing and mature. For one couple in Bermuda, however, today is extra special. After 34 years of separation, they are finally celebrating their first anniversary as man and wife. Nancy Acton tells their story... It all started in 1965 with a simple note from a young college student to a young man whose singing she admired. With fellow members of The Four Winds -- a Notre Dame university singing group -- Hilton (Buddy) Hill III was taking part in a fund-raiser at a nearby school. A friend of one of the performers persuaded Carol to come along. A few days later, Mr. Hill received a note which said, "I enjoyed your singing and I would like to meet you.'' The 24-year-old Bermudian did not know the writer, but his fellow singers convinced him that she was a young woman with pimples. Weeks passed, then one Sunday The Four Winds were playing at a coffee house adjoining the university campus. "We finished our set and there was Carol -- tall and gorgeous,'' Mr. Hill smiles. "I think it was pretty much love at first sight.'' Even so, they faced huge problems. Buddy was black and Carol was a white Southerner, and while life at Notre Dame was well integrated and he was totally accepted, outside the self-contained campus, Indiana law forbade mixed couples to date or cohabit. Since they both lived in South Bend Mr. Hill could not even invite the young lady back for a coffee, so any dating would have to take place either surreptitiously or in groups. The young students also knew that their respective parents would be less than enthusiastic about a mixed romance. Added to all that, the duo were at opposite ends of the educational spectrum. Mr. Hill was approaching the end of graduate school while Carol was in her first semester of college. Soon she would be leaving for school in New York, while Buddy (who already held a Bachelor of Arts degree in sociology with a minor in psychology from Notre Dame) would join The Four Winds on the open road, with California as their final destination. Despite such overwhelming odds, the couple formed a close bond, and a year later, when the Four Winds came to Chicago for a gig, Buddy invited Carol to come along. She accepted but never showed up. "I thought maybe social and family pressures and the whole idea of my travelling on the road had affected her decision,'' Mr. Hill recalls. "I couldn't call her because I didn't know where she was.'' The truth was far worse. On her way to Chicago Carol had been involved in an automobile accident and was injured. Lying in hospital, not knowing where Buddy was, she concluded, "Maybe I'm not supposed to see this man at this time in our lives.'' It was, they now believe, their first test of patience in love. "Sometimes the right people meet, but it is the wrong time, and perhaps we really begin to see how patience needs to take a part in relationships,'' Mrs. Hill explains. A year passed, and success was building for The Four Winds. They had won a contract with Columbia Records which required them to move from California to New York. Meanwhile, Carol had met someone she felt she could be happy with, but in her soul Buddy remained "unfinished business'' and she couldn't leave it that way for the sake of her future happiness. So, recalling that the young man's father owned a travel agency in New York, she picked up the phone one day in 1967 and called him. "Not only did I happen to be in New York, but my father knew exactly where I was,'' Mr.

Hill relates. "We were sharing the same apartment.'' So Carol's message was duly passed on and the call was returned. From it, Buddy learned about the accident, and they talked at length about their feelings, hopes and dreams. As always, their conversations were level-headed, deep and thoughtful. They reached a decision. "I have always firmly believed that show biz is no place for a marriage, especially at age 26,'' Mr. Hill says. "So I told her that, in addition to the race issue, the way things were with me on the road, it was just too difficult.'' With the "unfinished business'' thus resolved and the chapter of their love seemingly closed forever, they both moved on. Carol became engaged and made plans to marry. Five days before the wedding, her husband-to-be was killed. Although Buddy and Carol would have no further contact for 18 years, they both enjoyed a remarkable set of similar experiences as they went through life. Each found new partners and were married within a year of each other, and both marriages lasted similar lengths of time. They were both involved in music -- Buddy and in choirs and singing, and Carol in choirs and singing as well as being an electric bass player in a jazz ensemble -- and they loved to cook. They also enjoyed water sports and skiing, and had often visited the same places. When Buddy's marriage broke up, his thoughts turned to Carol but he had no idea how to reach her. After a few years he embarked on a new relationship, and all went well. Carol, meanwhile, was divorced and raising her only daughter, Alexis, on her own. During a long drive on holiday, the ten-year-old girl became curious about her mother's past. "Have you ever loved anyone else?'' she asked. "Yes, I did have a life before,'' her mother replied, and went on to explain about the civil rights movement and having had the joy of meeting Buddy. She also told Alexis about some of the things that had happened before she was born with regard to integration. "From that point on, whenever she thought I should be dating, Alexis would say, `How about calling Buddy?' '' Mrs. Hill relates. "So, one day I worked up the nerve and called his mother in Bermuda. She remembered me because Buddy had told her all about me when he was at Notre Dame, and I felt she would do the right thing based on whether or not he was free.'' Sure enough, she relayed the message to her son, who was now working in Bermuda, and he decided to return the call because his present relationship was going through a rocky passage. As they always had done, he and Carol talked about that and many other things, and decided -- once again -- that the time was not right. "And then I really closed the book,'' Mrs. Hill says. "We are both unselfish, loyal people, and you don't leave other people's lives broken in the wake of doing something that you want to do.'' She had been living in Nashville, Tennessee for many years, had her own business which involved a lot of travelling, and had bought the house of her dreams -- an 1890, three-storey Queen Anne structure which she had renovated to her taste. It was where she planned to end her days. By 1999 Buddy's relationship ended and his thoughts drifted back to the good times he had shared with Carol. Should he, or should he not, try to reach her? Starting with a six-year-old telephone number he eventually traced his first love and left a message on her answering machine telling her he was uninvolved now and asking her to call him "as soon as possible''. While Carol was also free, she let days pass before responding, and when she did she told him she needed to think about things and would call him back. There were too many "what if's'' to consider, not least the possibility that if they did fall in love all over again it would mean a giant upheaval in her well-ordered life. For one thing, Buddy had always made it clear that his home was in Bermuda. Carol had never been there, knew nothing about the Island or its culture, or yet how she would be received by his A love that conquered all Continu ed from Page 37 "I knew my future hinged on that next call,'' Mrs. Hill relates.

There then began a series of marathon phone calls during which the duo discovered that, far from growing apart over the decades , they had, in fact, grown more alike. Finally, they agreed to meet in person and in July, 1999 Buddy flew to Nashville for what Carol insisted would be a friendly but platonic reunion.

"It was the best weeken d of our lives, and we both decided there was a future,'' they recall.

A month later Carol visited Bermuda, where she was warmly received by his family. Buddy also took her to his church, St. Paul AME, where she noticed she was the only white person there, but it didn't bother her because she was one of only a handful of whites in a 3000-member black church in Nashville.

Looking around, Carol smiled: "God, you knew back in Nashville that I would be here, and you prepared me for this.'' In November, Buddy flew to Nashville for Thanksgiving and slipped the engagement ring he had designed on Carol's finger, having first received Alexis' blessing to do so.

On February 14, 2000 the couple were married in Nashville, and spent their honeymoon cruising in the Caribbean. Later, they held a reception at Ariel Sands. They are now blissfully happy in the beautiful home which Buddy lovingly renovated and Carol decorated on Spring Benny Road in Sandys.

Carol continues to study for the ministry, and both share a deep Christian faith. They are thankful to God for watching over them throughout the years and feel He has brought them together for a purpose. Meanwhile, they regard Him as an integral part of their marriage, and walk to a special spot on the coastline every day to pray and give thanks for their union.

The devoted couple continue to lead busy lives and share many interests, including ministry, music and cooking.

Today (DESK: Wednesday) they will celebrate their first wedding anniversary in a very untraditional way -- by playing the piano and singing to the residents and staff of Lefroy House, where they regularly perform as volunteers.

"They are like family to us, and we feel that since God has been so good to us, we want to put our love back into the community in this way.'' they explain.

If that seems a far cry from the usual February 14 celebrations, they are not bothered.

"We are each other's Valentine's,'' they assure.