own agenda for the month of May.

In an effort to let those who might be helped know about its existence, Al-Anon has designated May as Public Information Month. During this time, representatives will use the print and broadcast media to get their message across, and on May 29 and 30 will also man an information booth on the verandah of the Bermuda Library in Hamilton.

"We will try to let the public know about the fellowship Al-Anon offers,'' said Dee G., Public Information and Co-operating with the Professional Community co-ordinator.

"Alcoholism is rampant on the Island and there is a lot of stress attached to it because people who live with alcoholics do a lot of covering up. They don't want people to know `the family secret', but the reality is that everybody knows about the alcoholic's behaviour. Alcoholism is a family disease.'' Despite the fact that Al-Anon has been around for a long time, there is still confusion in the public's mind as to what it actually is.

"AA stands for Alcoholics Anonymous, whereas Al-Anon doesn't stand for anything. It is not an abbreviation for Alcoholics Anonymous,'' Dee explained.

"-Anon signifies a support group.'' While Al-Anon's policy remains not to solicit members, Dee said the fellowship feels that its 12-step programme could help many more people if they only knew about it -- hence the May campaign to get the word across.

And just why should non-alcoholics want to consider Al-Anon? Because alcoholism does not lie in the bottle but in people. Compulsive drinking is a progressive, lifetime disease. It affects not only the drinker but the drinker's relationships. Friendships, employment, childhood, parenthood, love affairs and marriages all suffer from the effects of alcoholism.

Al-Anon family groups are described as "a fellowship of relatives and friends of alcoholics who share their experience, strength and hope in order to solve their common problems. Its members believe that alcoholism is a family illness, and that changed attitudes can aid recovery.'' "The family's best defence against the emotional impact of alcoholism is gaining knowledge and achieving the emotional maturity and courage needed to put it into effect,'' the literature states.

Through regular attendance at Al-Anon meetings family members learn how to deal with the problem. Among friends who understand, they become part of a constructive programme designed to achieve personal fulfilment and a new way of life.

Al-Anon does not give advice. Rather, it shows those who join that they have choices in their own lives: how to change their attitudes, how to live and let others live.

"By joining Al-Anon we try to learn how to live serenely with whatever is going on our our lives,'' Dee explained. "It is a programme which can be applied not only to alcoholism, but to your job, your family and your friends.'' Living with an alcoholic ultimately takes a great toll on family members. As the disease progresses, they experience increasing anger, resentment, frustration, anxiety, obsession and denial. The person closest to the alcoholic -- e.g. a wife or husband -- is affected most. They see that the drinking is out of hand and they try to control it. There is public shame and a private struggle to "fix'' the problem. Before long they feel they are to blame, and they take on the hurts, fears and guilt of the alcoholic.

These well-meaning people direct their attention to what the alcoholic is doing or not doing and how to get the drinker to stop. They cover up, fix everything, make excuses, tell lies to mend damaged relationships, and worry.

Eventually, they become angry with the alcoholic and want to strike back for the damage caused. Against common wisdom, they also begin to pretend, accepting promises which the alcoholic can't keep, and delude themselves that periods of sobriety, however brief, are a new turning point.

Small wonder, then, that when many people turn to Al-Anon it is with a sense of despair, a feeling that they have been cheated out of a loving companion, are over-burdened with responsibilities, unwanted, unloved and alone.

But the good news is that the group support offered at Al-Anon meetings is warm and caring, the atmosphere conducive to healing.

Through a 12-step programme, people learn how to change their own thinking in order to make a new and successful approach to living. They are given the skills to deal with all the negative feelings which have stunted their emotional and personal growth. Through fellowship, where anonymity is not only respected but guaranteed, their burdens are eased through shared experiences, hopes and strengths.

"The three C's we discuss a lot are: You didn't Cause it; you can't Control it; and you can't Cure it,'' Dee said.

Little by little, members discover feelings of self-worth, love and spiritual growth.

Al-Anon is not allied with any sect, denomination or political group, and there are no membership dues. Members are of both sexes and come from all walks of life. Active participation in meetings is neither demanded nor compulsory. Those who prefer to sit and listen may do so. Anyone who speaks is secure in the knowledge that nothing which is said goes beyond the confines of the meeting. Only first names and initials are used.

Further information on Al-Anon and the days and times of its meetings is available by telephoning 236-8606. Meetings are also listed in the Bermuda Calendar. Free literature is available at Montrose Cottage, Berry Hill Road, Paget, while hardback books on alcoholism are available in the adult and junior libraries. Books on Alateen, an anonymous group for teenage children of alcoholics and part of Al-Anon, are available from secondary school counsellors.