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How to cope with relationship strains

Thirteen local couples are now better equipped to cope with the stress and strains that pop up during relationships thanks to a visiting American couple.

Sonny and Mark Shulkin from Bala, Pennsylvania held a couples workshop over the weekend at the home of Robin and Tredick Gorham.

"It's a workshop for couples who want to know how to be in a relationship and manage issues that come up in any relationship,'' said Mrs. Shulkin. "We are teaching people how to live with a different person.'' Dr. Shulkin added: "It is the differences that attract people to one another, but it also becomes a source of some problems later on.

"So, in fact, incompatibility is not grounds for divorce, but grounds for marriage,'' he chuckled.

The couple said that during the weekend workshop, participants would learn how to speak to their partner so he/she would have a better understand of what the other was saying.

"We will also show them how to resolve their differences,'' Mrs. Shulkin added. "The whole thing is about the journey from infatuation to mature love.

"Part of us is young and part of us is mature. We need to know how to work on our relationships when the young part of us shows up.

The series of skills the pair taught to local couples are based on Imago therapy, outlined in the book Getting the Love You Want.

"Robin is the only trained Imago therapist in Bermuda,'' Mrs. Shulkin pointed out. "I think Robin is doing an incredible job in bringing something so state-of-the-art into Bermuda.

"The knowledge she has is cutting edge in the self-help way of psycho education.'' Anyone interested in learning more about Imago therapy can contact Mrs. Gorham at 296-3803.