Well, our Bermuda is comprised of each one of us in this lovely island. We all have an impact on countless people everyday. Therefore, each one of us from day to day makes a difference in the kind of Bermuda we will have.

It is true that we encounter many people who seem to be uncaring, who do not regard each other as valuable. People on the street seem so hurried, traffic is bustling by, people seem generally impatient with each other.

Stress appears to be at an all time high. Picture the average home in the morning. It is probably an intense circle. Time constraints greet us as we awaken since there are so many items on our list of `to do' before we can even walk out of the door. In addition to this, the days and weeks are packed with numerous deadlines. Life can be so overwhelmingly demanding. Demands cause stress and stress diminishes the potential for joy, peace and happiness.

Unfortunately this hurried lifestyle has an impact on relationships.

Statistics show that: Drug abuse is at a record high, this includes alcohol. People are seeking to increase their output or mask their stress and pain.

One of two marriages will end up in divorce. Seventy-five percent of second marriages end in divorce. Marriage begins with love and ends with pain and fear.

Two thirds of teenagers will become pregnant, including abortions. Teens are seeking love and attention.

One of three girls and one of eight boys will be sexually abused by the age of 18. There's an abuse of power, control and misplaced affections.

Relational statistics can be quite discouraging. Perhaps, if we take time within our busy schedules to honour one another more, some of these statistics could be reduced. Honour means placing highest value on someone: Husbands to wives, wives to husbands, children to parent, parents to children, friend to friend, colleague to colleague.

Who do you honour or value? Do they know that you value them? What do you do or say that shows them that they are valued? On a scale of 1-10, where do you place those with whom you have a significant relationship? Are they aware of the high value that you place on them? Consider these valuable checklists. Which depicts you? Dishonouring Acts can include: Ignoring or degrading another person's opinions, advice, or beliefs.

Burying oneself in the television or newspaper when someone is talking.

Creating jokes about a person's weak areas.

Repeating annoying habits.

Over committing to other projects or people outside of the home.

Harshly rebuking or dominating another person.

Unwilling to say I'M SORRY.

Honouring Acts can include: Saying I LOVE YOU to loved ones everyday.

Giving hugs to loved ones. Four hugs for maintenance, 12 hugs for growth.

Being polite by saying please, thank you, excuse me, etc.

Doing something nice to show appreciation.

Giving eye contact when someone is talking.

Speaking respectfully, even during a conflict.

Sharing a ready smile.

Giving compliments.

These acts of kindness will help others to feel honoured or valued. They have great potential to reduce the stress in our society. While one person cannot change the entire island, change really begins within each heart individually and can have a rippling effect from one person to another. We all want Bermuda to be a better place. Kindnesses expressed by each of us can reduce the stress level for ourselves and those around us. So, let's utilise the Honouring Act checklist. We can all share in the motto: BLOOM WHERE YOU'RE PLANTED.

The Family Matters column can be read every Thursday in The Royal Gazette, written by the Executive Directors of charities of the FNR -- Family Resource Network. The five agencies are, The Physical Abuse Centre, the Coalition for the Protection of Children, The Institute for Child & Family Health, P.A.R.E.N.T.S. and the Father's Resource Centre.