by Michael Bergmann, produced by Ted Hartley, Michael Bergmann `Milk and Money' is an exploration of a young man at a crossroads who finds himself swirling in a kaleidoscope of temptations and choices.

The roads he -- David -- follows are the fodder for this film as he moves, as one of the lines of the screenplay would have it, from being a "medical school drop-out'' to an "adventure''.

The film begins with David, like Alice through the Looking Glass, wondering along the street in New York when a woman asks him to help her with something which could last "several years''. A second woman asks him to hold a package wrapped in brown paper, and, tantalisingly, kisses him. A third beautiful woman wonders by, and propositions him on the street. What red-blooded male could refuse? Certainly not David.

Later, while helping the first woman he met with her plans to make a film, her wealthy uncle, who will be funding the film project, calls on David to help him with a cattle problem he's having. To resolve it, David discovers an all-night library specifically dedicated to the study of cattle. There, he meets a homeless man called, blissfully, Belted Galloway, who just so happens to be a genius where cattle are concerned. He's willing to part with this knowledge, but in exchange for a hot meal. A little short on cash, David takes Belted home to Mom and Dad's for dinner.

Cut to...a party given by the woman who asked David to hold the package, where he runs into his erstwhile lover. Confused, he leaves with her best friend and takes her home. The two, we are left in no doubt, spend an enjoyable night together, but only after tossing Belted -- who came back for more of mom's cooking -- out of David's bed.

In regard to the cattle, while Mr. Galloway's solution saves the day on the one hand, on the other it results 21 cows taking residence in his wealthy sponsor's grand New York apartment, a delivery which takes place while he is out of town.

While our cast is wringing their hands over the cows' habitation of the apartment, David falls in love with his benefactor's beautiful mistress, whose wardrobe consists entirely of nighties.

You get the picture.

It's a plot which even manages to have everyone -- even Belted -- fall in love at the end, in true happily ever after fashion.

The script is mildly written and, surreally, calls for the characters to behave as if all this off-centre behaviour is normal. Equally, the plot provides a series of extraordinary coincidences which give the audience an ongoing sense of giggly delight.

The cast was a strong one, with Peter Boyle, Dina Merrill and Olympia Dukakis.

The Oscar winner plays a lawyer who hands over $1.3 million from a trust fund David discovers he has, barely pausing to look up to urge the young couple to go out and enjoy the money and their life. By the way, David can only have the money if he's unemployed.

Michael Bergmann directed this film deftly, and with a light touch. There are no morals rammed home here. You can find them if you brush away at the surface a little bit, but mostly it's an escape into a topsy turvy world of dreams come true.

REBECCA ZUILL FILM FESTIVAL MPC REVIEW REV