new ZipXpress US mail forwarding service logo and branding.

But perhaps a little more research on its advertising people's part would have been of benefit. They say nearly as much as 75 percent of websites on the Internet today are devoted to X-rated stuff, so it should have been no surprise to Hester when she logged on bleary eyed early one morning to the new ZipX website to do a little e-shopping...but instead arrived at what appeared to be a nasty amateur porn site. She did a double take as the home page invited her in Spanish to come on in for some X-rated fun.

A flushed Hester quickly discovered she had made the easy mistake of typing in the wrong address, ZipX.com, instead of ZipX.bm. While the names are certainly the same and even the logos remarkably similar, Hester is sure that naughty pix are not what IBC had in mind for the 2,000-plus locals who have so far visited ZipX.bm and the accompanying bermudashoppingvillage.com to shop 'til they drop.

Being a nostalgic old gal, Hester prefers the sounds of the Seventies, but every once in a while, reluctantly, she's tempted to try out a CD from the present day.

So once she'd got over the shock of coming across that naughty ZipX website, Hester proceeded straight to amazon.com. Scouting about, she decided to try out David Bowie's latest CD, "hours'', which speaks from the point of view of an older man taking stock of his life. "You could say that I am attempting to write some songs for my generation,'' mused Bowie. Hester's not there yet, but it, er, struck the right chord. But as an added bonus, upon reading the reviews she discovered the album was actually written and recorded right here in Bermuda. Bowie, of course, rents a home here on a quiet lane in Somerset.

Hester's hears from reliable sources that there was no love lost when Janell Dill recently parted ways with the Bermuda College, where she had held the specially created post of assistant to the President/chief PR woman.

Hester is told that the former TV anchorwoman, and wife of former UBP MP Jerome Dill was not happy, for one, with the comments by NAR head and College governing board member Dr. Eva Hodgson , in the aftermath of the Dr. Donald Peter's leaked memo fiasco in which he accused a colleague of racism.

Dr. Hodgson in a letter to this newspaper spoke of "an enemy within'' undermining the College board and the PLP government, and also charged the hiring of Ms Dill was a "blatant political appointment''. She also hears that Ms Dill's job description had a curious rewrite.

Hester's sources don't know how far Ms Dill, who quit the College last month, will be taking this matter, but she's been told to keep her ear to the ground for any developments. Meanwhile, Ms. Dill is feeling more welcome in her new post on the team of An Extra Special Event, which is organising the Corporation of Hamilton's Millennium Street Festival.

The technical expertise of local TV stations ZBM/ZFB knows no bounds.

The Bermudian terrestrial channel decided that the blockbuster film Forrest Gump shown as the Thanksgiving movie on Thursday night was not quite good enough the way it was. Their clever technicians apparently decided the sound could be significantly improved by adding the noises from the editing of the night's news. So throughout the movie, the most tear-jerking moments were punctuated by the squeal of tape being fast-forwarded and the laughing and joking of the hard-nosed News Nine producers.

For those folks on the Island who fork out for pricey cable, you're missing out on a whole gamut of ZBM antics! Ah well, as Gump says, "Life is like a box of chocolates...'' Hester fears feminism in Bermuda could be on the wane after spotting a course offered by the Community Education programme. Admittedly "Sewing Men's Clothes'' didn't actually specify that only women need apply but it would be difficult to imagine too many male takers, particularly with the line "Students may bring their own sewing machines to class''.

Entrants can learn to tackle such macho items as the reversible vests, long and short shirts and T-shirts. Hester can't imagine why this requires special sewing techniques but maybe all those manly bulges put extra pressure on the, um, stitching.

Hester has always suspected that VSB is run on a shoestring ...and she couldn't help but chuckle over some recent on-air bloopers including CDs jumping all over the place and newsreaders trying to make themselves heard while previous news items are played again.

However, the trying conditions seemed to take their toll on the station's news heavyweight Bryan Darby last week. He turned up for a Senate session, only to be seen apparently fighting a losing battle with the Sandman a few minutes later. Hester knows our legislators can have an, er, soporific effect on the common folk, but last week's sitting only lasted half an hour! But Hester wonders who was asleep on the job last Friday when she tuned in to hear the debate over renaming the first day of Cup Match Emancipation Day, only to hear a whole lot of nothing, really.

When VSB finally came back on the air, MPs were bidding goodnight. A brief apology followed from VSB's techno whizzes -- apparently a fault in the Dockyard tower caused the station to go off-air.

Speaking of last week's cantankerous House of Assembly debate about the renaming of Cup Match, it brought forward a most puzzling phrase from Transport Minister Dr. Ewart Brown . He eloquently commended the PLP Government for having the "testicular fortitude'' to tackle the race debate.

It brought forward wry laughter from legislators on both sides of the House but left the correspondent perplexed.

Hester just wishes Mr. Brown, when he's demonstrating fortitude -- either the intestinal or the testicular versions -- would have the balls to say what he really means.